by Licensed Therapist Rachel Ford
As May is Mental Health Awareness month- I would like to get this point across; WE ALL STRUGGLE. Yes, you, me, all of us. It is fascinating to me that there is so much shame in admitting that we struggle. That we deal with sadness, stress, hardships in relationships and that sometimes; that sadness and stress turn into depression and anxiety. The reality is; life is hard and there are so many beautiful moments but there are also a lot of hard moments.
I am not sure where the belief came from that we all have to have these perfect lives. That if things are hard, we must be doing something wrong. I would love nothing more but to change that belief. For the reality to be our truth and that reality is life is hard, bad things happen to good people, relationships end, we get lost sometimes, we get burned out and overwhelmed by the demands of life; and all of this is ok.
I often say to my clients when they are struggling; that I would be more concerned if they were not having a hard time going through what they were going through- like if they were “all fine and dandy” then I would actually be MORE concerned about their mental health. Hardships are a part of life; and when we carry around shame and guilt for having these hardships, or not coping perfectly in every situation; we actually increase our suffering. We often want to move through our sadness or discomfort as quickly as possible. Make it go away, avoid it, rush to get through it. But one of the best tools I can give you is LEARN TO SIT WITH IT. Just be with it- whatever IT is and trust me, you will grow stronger, wiser and more resilient by being with those uncomfortable feelings and emotions.
It is human nature to form relationships based off of shared experiences. At Allomi we strive to connect the community in all ways and ensure that ALL experiences that we face in life are supported. Yes- we offer the community a chance to come dance together, meditate together, sweat together but we also offer the community a chance to come talk about their struggles together, to manage our anxiety as a community, to talk about the hardships of motherhood, to address our negative relationship with food and our bodies- To admit we struggle and to be able to say it out loud without guilt, shame or it meaning that something is wrong with us.
To learn more about the different ways Allomi can support you check out allomi.com